Earlier than she celebrated her milestone birthday, actor Sushmita Sen mirrored on how her relationship with herself has developed over time.Talking about turning 50 this November, in dialog with Dr Sheen Gurrib, she shared, “You’d have met nobody who talks to herself like I do. You may have second, you convey your self to the facet and say, ‘Don’t get carried away. It’s transient, don’t get carried away.’”ARTICLE CONTINUES BELOW VIDEO
She added that her self-talk doesn’t simply present up in moments of pleasure. It anchors her throughout setbacks, too. “You may have a foul second, you pull your self again in and say, you bought this child, you’ve seen a lot in life, that is nothing. Get again up, you are able to do this.”
In line with her, this inside dialogue grew to become a realized talent, one thing she found through the Miss Universe contest, a transformative interval of her life. “That potential I realized in these 31 days, as a result of I realised I needed Rakesh Sharma. I needed to be the primary Indian (to win), and right here God had put me ready the place I may very well be the primary Indian.” She talked about how simply moments earlier than the winner was imagined to be introduced, she knew that she was going to win.
So how does this type of balanced self-talk assist regulate feelings, particularly for folks navigating main life transitions?
Sonal Khangarot, licensed rehabilitation counsellor and psychotherapist, The Reply Room, tells indianexpress.com, “Balanced self-talk, like Sushmita Sen’s reminder to remain grounded in good moments and hopeful in tough ones, is a core emotional-regulation talent. It helps folks pause, assess conditions realistically, and keep away from being swept away by extremes. For these getting into main life transitions, similar to turning 40 or 50, this turns into particularly essential.”
She continues, “At 40, many expertise midlife reevaluation, evaluating the place they’re with the place they thought they need to be. Self-talk like ‘I can redefine success at my tempo’ reduces anxiousness and perfectionism. At 50, folks might face empty-nest modifications, well being shifts, or identification renegotiation. Optimistic self-talk doesn’t deny actuality; it gives steadiness.”
Compassionate self-talk vs. motivational self-talk
Compassionate self-talk like ‘You bought this, child’ works higher than harsh criticism as a result of the mind responds to supportive language with calmer nervous-system exercise, higher problem-solving, and better motivation.Story continues beneath this advert
Khangarot states, “Psychologically, talking kindly mirrors the tone we use with family members, activating security fairly than risk. It additionally soothes the inside youngster, lowering previous fears of failure or rejection. Harsh self-talk triggers the physique’s stress response, narrowing considering and growing anxiousness. Coaching a kinder inside voice begins with noticing vital ideas and deliberately changing them with light, encouraging statements.”
How can strange folks domesticate resilient self-talk of their day by day lives?
Resilient self-talk doesn’t require a disaster; it may be constructed by way of small, constant practices. As a psychologist, I usually encourage folks to begin by observing their day by day inside dialogue and gently correcting harsh ideas.
“Utilizing evidence-based instruments like cognitive restructuring, journaling, and grounding statements helps prepare the mind to reply with steadiness fairly than panic. Repeating supportive phrases throughout routine stress—site visitors, workload, household tensions — creates neural pathways just like what Sen developed in these 31 intense days. Over time, the thoughts learns to decide on calm, life like, encouraging language, strengthening resilience lengthy earlier than a serious life occasion happens,” concludes Khangarot.

