Again in February, the Lawyer Normal of the US Pam Bondi gleefully informed Fox Information that she had Jeffrey Epstein’s shopper checklist “on my desk.” The top of the Division of Justice typically doesn’t go on cable information to brag about an investigation right into a useless man, however Epstein’s case had taken a spot within the right-wing conspiro-sphere and Bondi was prepared to take advantage of a couple of minutes of fame to speak concerning the grand prize on the finish of the QAnon creation calendar!
The “shopper checklist” was the fabled doc that turned Epstein from a despicable intercourse prison into the lynchpin holding the deep state collectively. The checklist would, based on essentially the most addled minds on the web, lastly show that liberals run a worldwide pedophile cult out of a pizza place. Nobody had ever seen this shopper checklist, however the high legislation enforcement official within the nation informed the general public that it not solely existed, however that she already had it dropped onto her desk.
And she or he actually wouldn’t have stated something that imprudent if she didn’t even have something to report. Proper?
Pam Bondi in February: The Epstein shopper checklist is sitting on my desk proper now to evaluation.Pam Bondi in the present day: There isn’t any Epstein shopper checklist and no “additional disclosure” of Epstein-related materials “could be acceptable or warranted.”— MeidasTouch (@meidastouch.com) 2025-07-07T01:46:47.383Z
Having earlier launched a closely redacted set of Epstein recordsdata — together with JFK assassination supplies that roughly confirmed the Warren Fee was proper all alongside — the Justice Division simply adopted up with a memo explaining that the shopper checklist doesn’t exist, there’s nothing within the Epstein recordsdata that they really feel like divulging, and he undoubtedly killed himself. Kash Patel and Dan Bongino, now operating the FBI, beforehand mused that Epstein was murdered to stop him from revealing the extent of the conspiracy. Now they’re formally backing the Justice Division’s moist blanket of a memo:
This systematic evaluation revealed no incriminating “shopper checklist.” There was additionally no credible proof discovered that Epstein blackmailed outstanding people as a part of his actions. We didn’t uncover proof that might predicate an investigation in opposition to uncharged third events.
As onerous as it might be, put apart every part concerning the horrific crimes concerned on this case. One in every of two issues occurred right here.
Both the Lawyer Normal is presently engaged in overlaying up a damning shopper checklist that might expound upon allegations of the the pedophile intercourse trafficker’s ties to at the least some key Trump donors. Or there by no means was a shopper checklist and Bondi was simply bald-faced mendacity for consideration when she explicitly stated that it was on her desk.
Neither is nice!
The previous could be a prison conspiracy run from the very best halls of presidency. The latter is that the Lawyer Normal reveals a degree of weaponized stupidity that ought to disqualify her from managing a Chipotle, not to mention the Justice Division. It’s in all probability the latter, however then what, precisely, was the endgame? Baiting their most rabid and harmful followers that there was a giant revelation coming that they by no means bothered to confirm existed? Not precisely 3D chess over there.
James Comey turned a pariah as a result of he felt compelled to tell Congress that he wanted to right his testimony over finally irrelevant and redundant paperwork that hadn’t beforehand come to his consideration. Quick ahead and the Justice Division is chatting up cable information about paperwork that don’t exist.
Or at the least they now say don’t exist.
That the AG publicly misled the nation is the true scandal that’s going to get buried as morons tweet about conspiracy theories.
Sure. Positively somebody method above the president wielding unprecedented energy to defy Congress and the courts whereas disappearing folks to El Salvador. And if the elite pedophiles are above Trump… does that imply he’s complicit with them? As a result of if he have been preventing them wouldn’t they simply eliminate him with all their energy? In both case, it doesn’t seem to be a motive to help him.[1]
Occam’s Razor continues to take an undeserved beating.
It actually couldn’t be the pure and logical consequence of an administration headed by a man who partied with Epstein and infamously phrase vomited his method via a dialog concerning the Epstein recordsdata, pre-butting that “it’s quite a lot of phony stuff.”
However I digress. The Justice Division is absolutely untethered from any skilled crime-fighting requirements. Letting conspiracy theorists form division priorities, untimely public proclamations, quick and unfastened dealing with of key proof… that is how an company squanders its credibility. I imply, they’re already making up pretend quotes in courtroom so there isn’t a lot credibility to be misplaced. However there’s one thing concerning the very public nature of this bumbling escapade.
That is about deeply severe prison exercise. Epstein was a monster. And the AG handled it as a carnival act. Because it occurs, that chyron from the February information hit now appears weirdly prophetic: The DOJ has misplaced its mission to battle crime.
[1] Additionally, somebody actually wants to speak to Musk about his weird failure to grasp this ebook collection. He could be the primary villain of those books! It’s one factor for these tech bros to uncritically invent applied sciences that sci-fi authors warned us about, nevertheless it’s one other for the richest right-wing determine on the planet to always reference a ebook that’s not even delicate concerning the theme: “socialism would make every part higher.”
Joe Patrice is a senior editor at Above the Regulation and co-host of Pondering Like A Lawyer. Be happy to electronic mail any ideas, questions, or feedback. Comply with him on Twitter or Bluesky in the event you’re concerned about legislation, politics, and a wholesome dose of school sports activities information. Joe additionally serves as a Managing Director at RPN Govt Search.
