‘The nurse told me I couldn’t keep my baby’: how a controversial Danish ‘parenting test’ separated a Greenlandic woman from her children | Parents and parenting

‘Now your two hours start.” The countdown began when Keira Alexandra Kronvold had simply given delivery within the early hours of seven November 2024. Keira, 38, was initially granted only one hour together with her daughter, Zammi, earlier than her child was to be faraway from her and brought to foster dad and mom – however the midwife begged authorities to offer them extra time. Earlier than Zammi’s arrival, the midwife requested if Keira had any needs. “I mentioned, ‘I need hand and footprints. I need to seize her, I don’t need you to catch her when she is born. I need to catch her myself.’”Throughout labour – which lasted simply an hour and a half – Keira stored checking whether or not her 20-year-old daughter, Zoe, who had by no means seen a delivery earlier than, was OK; and he or she was decided to not scream, to keep away from waking up the opposite moms and infants on the ward. However when Zammi arrived, all the things else – the months of stress, fear and stress – gave option to pure pleasure. “I simply laid again,” she says, arms cradled and slowly reclining on her couch, as she re-enacts the second at residence within the city of Thisted, northern Denmark, “as a result of I needed to preserve her heat. She was so lovely. That emotional feeling is indescribable. Proper there: unconditional love, pure happiness, all that pleasure.” She wished Zammi a contented birthday and informed her how a lot she liked her. She cried tears of pleasure, counted Zammi’s tiny fingers.After which the temper shifted. “It feels such as you come into the darkness,” says Keira, her physique frozen. “Now I’ve to rely the minutes. That pure pleasure was gone. And that second I felt I might present my feelings.” She began to breastfeed Zammi. Even letting go for the midwife to do her checks was torturous.{A photograph} of Zammi sits within the cradle that Keira had ready for herAn hour handed. She was informed she wanted to begin making ready at hand her daughter over. Keira talks in regards to the contents of the bag she had ready for Zammi. Seven months on, Keira can nonetheless see all of the objects earlier than her: bottle, dummy, heat garments, blanket, shampoo, lotion. “I gave her a diaper, I put her garments on,” says Keira, “and the lady got here in.” She cries as she remembers. “I had to ensure my tears didn’t fall on my daughter’s face. Zoe held her for a few minutes. I keep in mind each small element about her.”Zammi had a tiny nostril, says Keira with fun, and he or she remembers her facial expressions. She had black hair and blue eyes when she was born. Her fingers, says Keira, had been like Zoe’s, and her ft had been positively these of Zammi’s father. She had a heart-shaped birthmark the place her chest meets her neck and one other birthmark on the within of her little finger. When she made noises, Keira was overcome by the fantastic thing about her voice. “There was an enormous connection,” she says. “When she checked out me whereas breastfeeding and he or she closed her eyes, she felt so protected.”A lady got here to gather the newborn from hospital. After handing over the bag, Keira kissed Zammi. “I made a promise that I was going to combat for her,” she says. “I promised her I would ship her flowers each week. I promised her that she’s going to come residence quickly.” After Zammi was taken away, Keira lay on the mattress for a very long time crying, her physique shaking whereas the midwife gave her stitches. The midwife invited Keira to remain the night time in hospital, however she couldn’t bear to. So she went residence alone, with only a field containing her placenta, congratulations messages pouring in from well-wishers, who didn’t know Keira could be compelled to half from her child so shortly, whereas on the reverse finish of city Zammi, nonetheless simply hours outdated, met her foster dad and mom for the primary time.Keira is one among numerous Greenlandic ladies in Denmark who’ve been separated from their youngsters after present process extremely controversial “parenting competency” exams (often called forældrekompetenceundersøgelse or FKU) utilized by social providers to evaluate whether or not dad and mom are appropriate to care for his or her youngsters. In frequent with many of those instances, Zammi was positioned with Danish foster dad and mom. Keira fears Zammi will lose her language and identification in consequence. For years, parenting competency exams have been criticised by campaigners and human rights our bodies that say they’re culturally unsuitable for individuals from Inuit backgrounds, and due to this fact discriminatory.Usually, the exams are used if a baby is believed to be fighting challenges in behaviour, emotions or ideas – and can type one a part of a social employee’s investigations, says medical psychologist Isak C Nellemann, who used to carry out FKU for the Danish state, and now helps advise households and legal professionals in instances like Keira’s. However, typically, he says, merely being Greenlandic can be sufficient to get the eye of social employees.The exams cowl attachment, character traits, cognitive skills and psychopathology, and take about 15-20 hours. It’s nearly not possible to go them, says Nellemann; even he and his colleagues have failed to take action. Questions can embody “What’s glass product of?” and “What’s the identify of the large staircase in Rome?” Nellemann argues that the exams are culturally particular and a poor option to measure innate intelligence. “There may be lots of stigmatisation of individuals from Greenland,” he says. “We don’t know why we must always use these exams for parenting.”When Keira was given the check, for Zammi, she says she was informed it was to see if she was ‘civilised sufficient’He even goes as far as to check the exams to a instrument of fascism. “You are taking just one sort of individuals because the ‘actual’ ones. We solely select the white, or ‘actual’, Danish individuals.”Youngsters with Greenlandic dad and mom dwelling in Denmark are considerably extra prone to be positioned into care than these with Danish dad and mom. A 2022 report discovered that 5.6% had been eliminated in contrast with 1% of these with a Danish background. Louise Holck, the director of the Danish Institute for Human Rights, has mentioned the FKU exams “fail to account for potential language boundaries or cultural variations”.Till 1953, Greenland was dominated by Denmark as a colony. Now the territory is a part of the Danish kingdom, with Copenhagen controlling its overseas and safety coverage. Lately, there have been a number of scandals about historic and newer population-control practices which were described by many in Greenland, together with the previous prime minister, as a genocide. These embody the IUD scandal, during which 4,500 ladies and ladies had been fitted with contraception with out their information or consent between 1966 and 1970. Most of the particulars have solely just lately come to gentle.Keira, who has three youngsters, all of whom have been faraway from her, was subjected to an FKU check in 2014 that’s understood to have contributed to the elimination of Zoe, who was then 9, and Keira’s son, Nolan, who was simply eight months outdated and breastfeeding; he’s now 11. Nolan, whom Keira sees twice per week, now lives along with his father. Keira was given one other check final 12 months that contributed to the elimination of Zammi. When she was given the newest check, she says she was informed it was to see if she was “civilised sufficient”. The 2 assessments, 10 years aside, had been made by the identical Danish-speaking psychologist, who was additionally Keira’s therapist. Keira’s first language is Kalaallisut (West Greenlandic). She will not be fluent in Danish.From left: Keira’s daughter, Zoe, who was taken from her mom aged 9, pictured with a drawing of one among her hallucinations.Keira’s lawyer, Jeanette Gjørret, who specialises in youngsters’s rights, says there have been “many errors within the case, together with within the psychological exams”. She didn’t have a translator for both check, and the case for Zammi’s elimination rested closely on the instances of her first two youngsters, during which there have been additionally errors. “The choice was taken earlier than Zammi was born, and Keira was not given the chance to stay in supported lodging so as to preserve her child, which she would have been ready to do if crucial. In Keira’s case, the elimination of all three of her youngsters has been largely right down to the perspective of 1 particular person,” Gjørret provides. She didn’t have authorized illustration or recommendation whereas the assessments had been made.The 2024 FKU evaluation, performed simply over a month earlier than Zammi was born, concluded that though “Keira sincerely desires to convey her little daughter residence” and “the kid is rising and thriving [in the womb]”, Keira’s character had “not developed sufficiently” and that “difficulties could come up relating to linguistic and cognitive stimulation of the younger youngster”.It added: “Keira states that it is not uncommon in Greenlandic tradition that even small facial options have communicative significance … however Zammi will develop up in Denmark and can be depending on having the ability to learn the social contexts she can be concerned in – and due to this fact must be taught this so as to have the ability to cope in social relationships with friends.” To have her child returned to her, she must work on a number of areas and “present improvement” – together with “expressing herself in Danish”, turning into “extra nuanced in her strategy to herself and her environment” and being “capable of specific herself with clearer facial expressions”.As quickly as I see her mattress I crumble. It’s like I’m dwelling by my willZammi’s empty cot.Though Danish authorities take into account Zammi’s elimination to be authorized as a result of a court docket has issued a judgment within the case, Gjørret doesn’t agree. “It’s my evaluation that Zammi shouldn’t have been positioned with foster dad and mom,” she says.Having unsuccessfully fought the case in Holstebro court docket of enchantment in April, they’ve utilized to take it to the excessive court docket, which, if profitable, might have far-reaching penalties for Greenlandic victims of the exams. She has requested that the excessive court docket overturn the choice “in its entirety” on the idea of the Institute for Human Rights’ findings and a brand new legislation, which got here into pressure in Could, banning using FKU on Greenlandic individuals. She remains to be ready for a choice.Regardless of the ban, parenting competency exams are nonetheless being utilized by municipalities as proof in opposition to Greenlandic dad and mom on the Nationwide Social Appeals Board, Gjørret says. The Ministry of Social Affairs and Housing denies this, saying that “Since Could 1, 2025, the Nationwide Social Appeals Board has not used standardised psychological exams for selections on placement of a kid from a Greenlandic household in care outdoors the house.”Issues could possibly be about to vary. Laila Bertelsen, the founding father of Foreningen Mapi, an affiliation that helps Inuit dad and mom in Denmark, says she is conscious of 1 mom whose separation from her youngsters has been reversed because the change of legislation. Usually, she says, cultural variations – language, household life and upbringing – are misinterpreted by Danish research {and professional} assessments. “Which means that the kids usually are not solely eliminated bodily, but additionally reduce free from their cultural roots and identification.” Pressured elimination at delivery ought to solely be achieved in “extraordinarily pressing conditions, the place there’s a documented hazard”, she says. In all different instances, households ought to as a substitute be given help, attachment and togetherness. “Not just for the kid’s security, however for the kid’s self-understanding and identification formation.”You may really feel the empty cot in Keira’s residence earlier than you see it. An absence radiates from the unoccupied bassinet, lovingly draped with sheer material. A bee and a dragonfly cling down from a cellular. Subsequent to it, somewhat automotive seat and a child bouncer lie in wait.Then you definately see the tiny nappies, lined up on the altering station alongside a recent bottle of child lotion and cotton wool. On the windowsill lies a worn copy of the Danish attachment parenting e-book Den Bedste Begin på Livet (The Greatest Begin to Life). However maybe it’s the cabinet filled with new child garments folded in neat piles that the majority bluntly reveals that no child has ever lived there.For seven months, Keira’s residence in Thisted, a market city on the Limfjorden strait within the north-west nook of Denmark, has waited for Zammi to return residence. Keira is allowed to go to her youngest daughter as soon as per week for precisely one hour on a Friday morning. Zoe and Nolan are solely allowed to see their child sister as soon as a month. Keira, who works in a fish manufacturing unit, spends the week counting right down to Friday at 10.30am.She struggles to sleep and finds it tough to eat. “I ask many individuals, ‘Please pray for my daughter or I can’t sleep.’ Nights may be for ever. I rely days.” She pauses. “To start with, I counted hours.”When she first went again to work, 10 weeks after Zammi was born, she was nonetheless struggling to face for lengthy intervals, and at instances needed to disguise in the bathroom to cry. She has spent the final decade preventing to be reunited together with her older youngsters, and now Zammi, and but she finds the energy to maintain going. “It’s like I’m dwelling by my will,” she says. She tries to remain constructive by engaged on methods to get her child again, and is recording her experiences for a e-book. “I’m pondering, ‘What’s the subsequent step? What ought to I do?’ However as quickly as I see her mattress, I crumble.”Keira and Zoe at residence in Thisted.Keira separated from Zammi’s father, who’s Danish, when she was 4 months pregnant, however says he stays an energetic a part of hers and Zammi’s lives. He has not spoken out publicly. “He loves his daughter,” she says. “However he’s scared that the world will choose him.” She believes her former associate fears the disgrace, psychological toll and stress of turning into a public determine could be an excessive amount of.Keira first spoke out on the night time she got here residence from hospital. Unable to deal with all of the questions on what was happening, she determined to elucidate her scenario on Fb. She didn’t have a look at it for a few days, however when she did, her video had gone viral. She had a whole lot of messages from individuals expressing sympathy and giving their condolences. “I used to be so touched by it,” she says. “I believed, ‘Persons are listening to my voice.’ That’s what gave me motivation to combat again.” Whereas Keira’s case is one among many, the overwhelming majority of people that have their youngsters taken away don’t have the energy to go public.Protests over Keira’s case befell in Copenhagen and Nuuk, and with Danish-Greenlandic relations below a world highlight after Donald Trump’s threats to take management of the territory, the marketing campaign began to get political traction. Keira attended one of many demonstrations 32 days after giving delivery, when she was nonetheless bleeding and fighting milk manufacturing. In January, the FKU testing ban was introduced by the Danish authorities. How did Keira discover the braveness to talk out? “I say to myself, if I don’t do it, no person will. I don’t care if anyone judges me. I do know if I modify one thing now, I’ll change one thing for Zammi.”Keira grew up in Qeqertaq, a small village in western Greenland, together with her mom, who has just lately died, and father, who has retired after a few years because the director of a fish manufacturing unit. She remains to be near him and most of her 5 siblings, who’re “heartbroken” about her separation from Zammi. Keira has blissful childhood recollections of driving the canine sleigh and searching together with her father. Yearly, the household would spend three months dwelling in nature. She gave delivery to Zoe in Greenland and later moved to Denmark with a plan to review therapeutic massage remedy.For Zoe, who sits quietly in Keira’s lounge as we discuss, nothing can flip again the clock. After being faraway from her mom at 9, she spent the remainder of her childhood with a foster household and in youngsters’s properties, and says she was the sufferer of emotional abuse. However she is set to get justice for her sister, who she hopes can be reunited with their mom earlier than her first birthday. Throughout the court docket listening to in April, she stood outdoors in silent protest with banners she had made out of material, studying: “Please convey my little sister again residence” and “FKU is just for Danish residents”.Talking softly, she says that earlier than she was compelled to stay with a foster household, she loved faculty and was particularly good at talking English, maths and taking part in chess. She hated getting up early within the morning and fondly remembers her mom, who’s a morning particular person, plaiting her hair whereas she was nonetheless asleep.Keira says social providers abruptly started visiting after Zoe had began faculty, saying they needed to verify whether or not she was taking adequate care of her youngsters. However what they actually meant, she says, is “it’s important to do it in our means. Not your means.” Among the many issues they’d with doing issues Keira’s means was that they spoke Greenlandic at residence moderately than Danish.Keira on her option to go to Zammi. She is allowed to see her for one hour each FridayHaving grown up in a village the place she says “everyone was a member of the family”, the state intervention she was subjected to in Denmark was alien and disconcerting. She was being commonly noticed at residence – together with whereas making dinner, breastfeeding, taking a stroll. If she spoke to her youngsters in Greenlandic, she needed to translate it to Danish for the social employee. What they deemed “errors” began to pile up, and they might convey them up months later. These, she says, could possibly be something from the best way she spoke to Zoe at dinner to her not wanting her daughter to stroll residence alone from faculty when she was eight years outdated. “Good and quiet, accumulating your errors,” says Keira. “It was scary, scary. I used to be at all times nervous. I at all times felt stress.”Zoe, who was just lately identified with schizophrenia, began experiencing hallucinations when she was together with her foster household. At one level, Keira says softly, her daughter was suicidal. Zoe reveals me some current drawings of the faces that she sees. One of many figures represents an individual who was answerable for taking care of her when she was faraway from her mom.When Keira grew to become pregnant with Zammi, she determined to tell Thisted municipality within the hope of working collectively to make sure she might preserve her as soon as she was born. She was nervous going to the physician, as a result of she says she had beforehand been given the ultimatum both to have an abortion or face the newborn being taken away after the delivery. She agreed to bear one other parenting competency check in an try to cooperate. However within the session, the psychologist introduced up her earlier abortions and requested her to point out her parenting abilities by taking part in, singing and speaking with a doll, checking whether or not she made eye contact. “The issue is, I didn’t develop up with a doll,” she says, including that her actual child, Zammi, was busy kicking in her abdomen. “They made me draw they usually had been criticising it, that I didn’t draw a face. I drew a mum and child.”She first heard the municipality was planning to take away Zammi from her throughout her eight-month scan. One minute she was speaking to her, laughing, watching her kick. The subsequent, she says, the physician or nurse informed her: “Effectively, it appears like they selected to take the newborn.” She was incredulous. “It felt like the entire world was crashing down. I believed, ought to I journey to a different nation? I don’t have any cash.” When she known as the municipality, she says they claimed ignorance, however it later turned out to be true.{A photograph} of Keira and Zammi taken throughout one among Keira’s weekly visitsAccording to remark notes of Zammi, shared with me by Keira, her daughter has proven indicators of upset after her mom’s visits. “After the interplay was over, she grew to become very distant,” says an remark from February. “She confirmed little interest in interacting with foster dad and mom or toys.”Lars Sloth, director of Thisted’s youngster and household administration, declined to touch upon Keira’s case straight, citing an obligation of confidentiality. However he acknowleged that typically the change within the legislation meant that Greenlandic instances ought to be reprocessed with out using FKU. Gjørret says there isn’t a cause why Keira can not deal with Zammi, describing her as “very sturdy and impartial”. Regardless of all that she has been via together with her youngsters, she says she continues to combat for them, holds down a job, and doesn’t drink or take medication. “I can not discover any cause why she can’t be a mom.”A spokesperson for the Danish ministry of social affairs and housing mentioned that the choice to position a baby or younger particular person in care outdoors the house is made by the municipal council, and that any placements made earlier than the change within the legislation could possibly be appealed. “Municipalities are now not allowed to make use of standardised psychological exams as a part of the kid safety examination when making selections about putting a baby from a Greenlandic household in out-of-home-care. As a substitute, municipalities should use a particular unit possessing experience in Greenlandic language and tradition affairs, until the household doesn’t consent to using the particular unit.“The municipal council can be obligated to request that the specialised unit assessment all ongoing placements the place standardised psychological exams have been used or have to be assumed to have been utilized in connection with selections about putting a baby from a Greenlandic household.”On Friday morning, I stroll via Keira’s open entrance door as rain falls in torrents outdoors, to seek out her sitting in her lounge below tender fairy lights and the silently flickering tv, arranging flowers. Each week she takes a special association to Zammi in order that she’s going to affiliate them together with her mom’s visits. This ceremonial act of devotion is a part of how Keira survives.She ties up her lengthy darkish hair and prepares to depart. Carrying an umbrella, she walks, nearly in procession, via the city to see Zammi. When she reaches the suburban avenue the place Zammi’s foster dad and mom stay – low-rise homes, neatly trimmed hedges, flagpoles within the entrance gardens – we half methods; she will not be allowed to take guests.On her return, simply over an hour later, Keira is upset that Zammi wasn’t sporting sufficient garments and appeared chilly, however she additionally seems to be nourished from spending time together with her daughter. We sit within the automotive as she reveals me photos and movies. Zammi had achieved her particular whats up, the place she put her fingers on Keira’s cheeks, and he or she is on the stage the place she loves taking a look at mirrors. In a video, Keira coos to Zammi in Greenlandic: “Hello little child. Such a cute little child. My little darling.” Time goes so quick when they’re collectively. Generally she forgets to take photos.Whereas she is there, she thinks solely of Zammi. Her personal emotions can wait until she will get residence. It’s at all times onerous. Earlier than she will get out of the automotive, she places into phrases the stress she is below. “It looks like anyone holding your throat. And so they determine how a lot you’ll be able to breathe.”